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the brains of innocent men were racked to invent tricks which might have
been put upon them by the illustrious Captain。 Thus livelier jests and
madder exploits were fathered upon him than upon any of his kind； and he
has remained for two centuries the prime favourite of the chap…books。
Robbing alone； he could afford to despise pedantry： did he meet a
traveller who amused his fancy he would give him the pass…word （‘the
fiddler's paid；' or what not）； as though the highway had not its code of
morals； nor did he scruple； when it served his purpose； to rob the bunglers
of his own profession。 By this means； indeed； he raised the standard of
the Road and warned the incompetent to embrace an easier trade。 While
he never took a shilling without sweetening his depredation with a joke； he
was； like all humorists； an acute philosopher。 ‘Remember what I tell
you；' he said to the foolish persons who once attempted to rob him； the
master…thief of England； ‘disgrace not yourself for small sums； but aim
high； and for great ones； the least will bring you to the gallows。' There；
in five lines； is the whole philosophy of thieving； and many a poor devil
has leapt from the cart to his last dance because he neglected the counsel
of the illustrious Hind。 Among his aversions were lawyers and thief…
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catchers。 ‘Truly I could wish；' he exclaimed in court； ‘that full…fed fees
were as little used in England among lawyers as the eating of swine's flesh
was among the Jews。' When you remember the terms of friendship
whereon he lived with Moll Cutpurse； his hatred of the thief…catcher； who
would hang his brother for ‘the lucre of ten pounds； which is the reward；'
or who would swallow a false oath ‘as easily as one would swallow
buttered fish；' is a trifle mysterious。 Perhaps before his death an
estrangement divided Hind and Moll。 Was it that the Roaring Girl was
too anxious to take the credit of Hind's success？ Or did he harbour the
unjust suspicion that when the last descent was made upon him at the
barber's； Moll might have given a friendly warning？
Of this he made no confession； but the honest thief was ever a liberal
hater of spies and attorneys； and Hind's prudence is unquestioned。 A
miracle of intelligence； a master of style； he excelled all his
contemporaries and set up for posterity an unattainable standard。 The
eighteenth century flattered him by its imitation； but cowardice and
swagger compelled it to limp many a dishonourable league behind。
Despite the single inspiration of dancing a corant upon the green； Claude
Duval； compared to Hind； was an empty braggart。 Captain Stafford
spoiled the best of his effects with a more than brutal vice。 Neither Mull…
Sack nor the Golden Farmer； for all their long life and handsome plunder；
are comparable for an instant to the robber of Peters and Bradshaw。 They
kept their fist fiercely upon the gold of others； and cared not by what
artifice it was extorted。 Hind never took a sovereign meanly； he
approached no enterprise which he did not adorn。 Living in a true
Augustan age； he was a classic among highwaymen； the very Virgil of the
Pad。
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A BOOK OF SCOUNDRELS
MOLL CUTPURSE AND
JONATHAN WILD
I MOLL CUTPURSE
THE most illustrious woman of an illustrious age； Moll Cutpurse has
never lacked the recognition due to her genius。 She was scarce of age
when the town devoured in greedy admiration the first record of her
pranks and exploits。 A year later Middleton made her the heroine of a
sparkling comedy。 Thereafter she became the favourite of the rufflers；
the commonplace of the poets。 Newgate knew her； and Fleet Street； her
manly figure was as familiar in the Bear Garden as at the Devil Tavern；
courted alike by the thief and his victim； for fifty years she lived a life
brilliant as sunlight； many…coloured as a rainbow。 And she is
remembered； after the lapse of centuries； not only as the Queen…Regent of
Misrule； the benevolent tyrant of cly…filers and heavers； of hacks and
blades； but as the incomparable Roaring Girl； free of the playhouse； who
perchance presided with Ben Jonson over the Parliament of Wits。
She was born in the Barbican at the heyday of England's greatness；
four years after the glorious defeat of the Armada； and had to her father an
honest shoemaker。 She came into the world （saith rumour） with her fist
doubled； and even in the cradle gave proof of a boyish； boisterous
disposition。 Her girlhood； if the word be not an affront to her mannish
character； was as tempestuous as a wind…blown petticoat。 A very ‘tomrig
and rump…scuttle；' she knew only the sports of boys： her war…like spirit
counted no excuse too slight for a battle； and so valiant a lad was she of
her hands； so well skilled in cudgel…play； that none ever wrested a victory
from fighting Moll。 While other girls were content to hem a kerchief or
mark a sampler； Moll would escape to the Bear Garden； and there enjoy
the sport of baiting； whose loyal patron she remained unto the end。 That
which most bitterly affronted her was the magpie talk of the wenches。
‘Why；' she would ask in a fury of indignation； ‘why crouch over the fire
with a pack of gossips； when the highway invites you to romance？ Why
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A BOOK OF SCOUNDRELS
finger a distaff； when a quarterstaff comes more aptly to your hand？'
And thus she grew in age and stature； a stranger to the soft delights of
her sex； her heart still deaf to the trivial voice of love。 Had not a
wayward accident cumbered her with a kirtle； she would have sought
death or glory in the wars； she would have gone with Colonel Downe's
men upon the road； she would have sailed to the Spanish Main for pieces
of eight。 But the tyranny of womanhood was as yet supreme； and the
honest shoemaker； ignorant of his daughter's talent； bade her take service
at a respectable saddler's； and thus suppress the frowardness of her passion。
Her rebellion was instant。 Never would she abandon the sword and the
wrestling…booth for the harmless bodkin and the hearthstone of
domesticity。 Being absolute in refusal； she was kidnapped by her friends
and sent on board a ship； bound for Virginia and slavery。 There； in the
dearth of womankind； even so sturdy a wench as Moll might have found a
husband； but the enterprise was little to her taste； and； always resourceful；
she escaped from shipboard before the captain had weighed his anchor。
Henceforth she resolved her life should be free and chainless as the
winds。 Never more should needle and thread tempt her to a womanish
inactivity。 As Hercules； whose counterpart she was； changed his club for
the distaff of Omphale； so would she put off the wimple and bodice of her
sex for jerkin and galligaskins。 If she could not allure manhood； then
would she brave it。 And though she might not cross swords with her
country's foes； at least she might levy tribute upon the unjustly rich； and
confront an enemy wherever there was a full pocket。
Her entrance into a gang of thieves was beset by no difficulty。 The
Bear Garden； always her favourite resort； had made her acquainted with
all the divers and rumpads of the town。 The time； moreover； was
favourable to enterprise； and once again was genius born into a golden age。
The cutting of purses was an art brought to perfection； and already the
more elegant practice of picking pockets was understood。 The transition
gave scope for endless ingenuity； and Moll was not slow in mastering the
theory of either craft。 It was a changing fashion of dress； as I have said；
which forced a new tactic upon the thief； the pocket was invented because
the hanging purse was too easy a prey for the thievish scissors。 And no
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sooner did the world conceal its wealth in pockets than the cly…filer was
born to extract the booty with his long； nimble fingers。 The trick was
managed with an admirable forethought； which has been a constant
example to after ages。 The file was always accompanied by a bull：；
whose duty it was to jostle and distract the victim while his pockets were
rifled。 The bung； or what not； was rapidly passed on to the attendant rub；
who scurried off before the cry of STOP THIEF！ could be raised。
Thus was the craft of thieving practised when Moll was enrolled a
humble member of the gang。 Yet nature had not endowed her with the
qualities which ensure an active triumph。 ‘The best signs and marks of a
happy； industrious hand；' wrote the hoyden； ‘is a long middle finger；
equally suited with that they call the fool's or first finger。' Now