按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！
inconsistency； he perceived were in reality self… sacrifice。 He
went on in frantic disquiet； distance no longer being of
consequence； and in his roaming chanced to pass through the
graveyard in which many generations of his ancestors lay buried。
Within the leaden coffins he saw the cold remains； some well
preserved； others but handfuls of dust。
〃Tell me； O my progenitors；〃 he cried； 〃you whose blood till this
morning flowed in my veins； is there not some way by which I； as
a spirit； can commune with the material world？ I have always
admired your judgment and wisdom； and you have all been in
Shadowland longer than I。 Give me； I pray you； some ancestral
advice。〃
The only sound in answer was the hum of the insects that filled
the evening air。 The moonlight shone softly； but in a ghastly
way； on the marble crosses of his vault and those around； and he
felt an unspeakable sadness within this abode of the dead。 〃How
many unfinished lives；〃 he thought； 〃have ended beneath these
sods！ Unimproved talents here are buried in the ground。
Unattained ambitions； and those who died before their time； those
who tried； in a half…hearted way； to improve their opportunities；
and accomplished something； and those who neglected them； and did
still lessall are together here； the just with the unjust；
though it be for the last time。 The grave absorbs their bodies
and ends their probationary record； from which there is no
appeal。〃
Near by were some open graves； ready to receive their occupants；
while a little farther on he recognized the Cortlandt mausoleum；
looking exactly as when shown him； through his second sight； by
the spirit on the previous day。
From the graves filled recently； and from many others； rose
threads of coloured matter； in the form of gases； the forerunners
of miasma。 He now perceived shadowy figures flitting about on
the ground and in the air； from whose eyes poured streams of
immaterial tears。 Their brains； hearts； and vertebral columns
were the parts most easily seen； and they were filled with an
inextinguishable anguish and sorrow that from its very intensity
made itself seen as a blue flame。 The ruffles and knickerbockers
in which some of these were attired； evidently by the effects of
the thoughts in their minds； doubtless from force of habit from
what they had worn on earth while alive； showed that they had
been dead at least two hundred years。 Ayrault also now found
himself in street clothes； although when in his clubs he had worn
a dress suit。
〃Tell me； fellow…spirits；〃 he said； addressing them； 〃how can I
communicate with one that is still alive？〃
They looked at him with moist eyes； but answered not a word。
〃I attributed the misery in my heart；〃 thought Ayrault； 〃entirely
to the distress at losing Sylvia； which God knows is enough； but
though I suspected it before； I now see； by my companions； that I
am in the depths of hell。〃
CHAPTER XII。
SHEOL。
Failing to find words to convey his thoughts； he threw himself
into an open grave； praying that the earth might hide his soul；
as he had supposed it some day would hide his body。 But the
ground was like crystal； and he saw the white bones in the graves
all around him。 Unable to endure these surroundings longer； he
rushed back to his old haunts； where he knew he should find the
friends of his youth。 He did not pause to go by the usual way；
but passed； without stopping； through walls and buildings。 Soon
he beheld the familiar scene； and heard his own name mentioned。
But there was no comfort here； and what he had seen of old was
but an incident to what he gazed on now。 Praying with his whole
heart that he might make himself heard； he stepped upon a
foot…stool； and cried：
〃Your bodies are decaying before me。 You are burying your
talents in the ground。 We must all stand for final sentence at
the last day； mortals and spirits alike there is not a shadow
of a shade of doubt。 Your every thought will be known； and for
every evil deed and every idle word God will bring us into
judgment。 The angel of death is among you and at work in your
very midst。 Are you prepared to receive him？ He has already
killed my body； and now that I can never die I wish there was a
grave for my soul。 I was reassured by a vision that told me I
was safe； but either it was a hallucination； or I have been
betrayed by some spirit。 Last night I still lived； and my body
obeyed my will。 Since then I have experienced death； and with
the resulting increased knowledge comes the loss of all hope；
with keener pangs than I supposed could exist。 Oh； that I had
now their opportunities； that I might write a thesis that should
live forever； and save millions of souls from the anguish of
mine！ Inoculate your mortal bodies with the germs of faith and
mutual love； in a stronger degree than they dwelt in me； lest you
lose the life above。〃
But no one heard him； and he preached in vain。
He again rushed forth； and； after a half…involuntary effort；
found himself in the street before his loved one's home。
Scarcely knowing why； except that it had become nature to wish to
be near her； he stood for a long time opposite her dwelling。
〃O house！〃 he cried； 〃inanimate object that can yet enthral me
so； I stand before your cold front as a suppliant from a very
distant realm； yet in my sadness I am colder than your stones；
more alone than in a desolate place。 She that dwells within you
holds my love。 I long for her shadow or the sound of her step。
I am more wretchedly in love than everI； an impotent； invisible
spirit。 Must I bear this sorrow in addition to my others； in my
fruitless search for rest？ My life will be a waking nightmare；
most bitter irony of fate。〃
The trees swayed above his head； and the moon； in its last
quarter； looked dreamily at him。
〃Ah；〃 thought Ayrault； 〃could I but sleep and be happy！
Drowsiness and weariness； fatigue's grasp is on me； or may
Sylvia's nearness soothe； as her voice has brought me calm！
Quiet I may some day enjoy； but slumber again； never！ I see that
souls in hades must ever have their misdeeds before them。 Happy
man in this world； the repentant's sins are forgiven！ You lose
your care in sleep。 Somnolence and drowsinessbalm of aching
hearts； angels of mercy！ Mortals； how blessed！ until you die；
God sends you this rest。 When I recall summer evenings with
Sylvia； while gentle zephyrs fanned our brows； I would change
Pope's famous line to 'Man never is； but always HAS BEEN
blessed。'〃
A clock in a church…steeple now struck three； the sound ringing
through the still night air。
〃It will soon be time for ghosts to go；〃 thought Ayrault。 〃I
must not haunt her dwelling。〃
There was a light in Sylvia's study； and Ayrault remained
meditatively gazing at it。
〃Happy lamp；〃 he thought； 〃to shed your light on one so fair！
She can see you； and you shine； for her。 You are better off than
I。 Would that her soul might shine for me； as your light shines
for her！ The light of my life has departed。 O that the darkness
were complete！ I am dead；〃 his thoughts ran on； and when the
privilege bitter word！that permits me to remain here has
expired； I must doubtless return to Saturn； and there in
purgatory work out my probation。 But what comfort is it that a
few centuries hence I may be able to revisit my native earth？
The flowers will bloom in the morning light；
And the lark salute the sun；
The earth will continue to roll through space；
And I may be nearer my final grace；
But Sylvia's life…thread will be spun。
〃Even Sylvia's house will be a heap of ruins； or its place will
be taken by something else。 If I had Sylvia； I should care for
nothing； as I have lost her； even this sight； though sweet； must
always bring regret。 I wish； at all events； I might see Sylvia；
if only with these spirit…eyes； since； as a mortal； she may never
gladden my sight again。〃
To his surprise； he now perceived that he could see；
notwithstanding the drawn shades。 Sylvia was at her
writing…desk； in a light…coloured wrapper。 She sat there resting
her head on her hand； looking thoughtful but worried。 Though it
was so late； she had not retired。 The thrush that Ayrault had
often in life admired； and that she had for some reason brought
up…stairs； was silent and asleep。
〃Happy bird！〃 he said； 〃you obtain rest and forgetfulness on
covering your head； but what wing can cover my soul？ I used to
wish I might flutter towards heaven on natural wings like you；
little thrush。 Now I can； indeed； outfly you。 But whatever I do
I'm unhappy； and wherever I go I'm in hell。 What is man in his
helpless； first spiritual state？ He is but a flower； and withers
soon。 Had I； like the bishop； been less blind； and obeyed my
conscience clear； I might have returned to my native earth while
Sylvia still sojourns here； and coming thus by virtue of
development； I should be able to commune with her。
〃What is life？〃 he continued。 〃In the retrospect； nothing。 It
seems to me already as but a