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so simple was a difficult； as well as a thankless labor。 I remember asking a
lady who had owned a 〃proscenium〃 at the old Academy； why she had
decided not to take a box in the （then） new opera…house。
〃Because； having passed thirty years of my life inviting people to sit in
my box； I intend now to rest。〃 It is very much the same thing with yachts。
A couple who had determined to go around the world； in their lately
finished boat； were dumbfounded to find their invitations were not eagerly
accepted。 After exhausting the small list of people they really wanted； they
began with others indifferent to them； and even then filled out their
number with difficulty。 A hostess who counts on a series of house parties
through the autumn months； must begin early in the summer if she is to
have the guests she desires。
It is just here that the 〃professional；〃 if I may be allowed to use such
an expression； comes to the front。 He is always available。 It is indifferent
to him if he starts on a tour around the world or for a winter spree to
Montreal。 He is always amusing； good… humored； and can be counted on at
the last moment to fill any vacant place； without being the least offended
at the tardy invitation； for he belongs to the class who have discovered
〃how to live well on nothing a year。〃 Luxury is as the breath of his nostrils；
but his means allow of little beyond necessities。 The temptation must be
great when everything that he appreciates most （and cannot afford） is
urged upon him。 We should not pose as too stern moralists； and throw
stones at him； for there may enter more 〃best French plate〃 into the
composition of our own houses than we imagine。
It is here our epoch shows its improvement over earlier and cruder
days。 At present no toad…eating is connected with the acceptance of
hospitality； or； if occasionally a small 〃batrachian〃 is offered； it is so well
disguised by an accomplished CHEF； and served on such exquisite old
Dresden； that it slips down with very little effort。 Even this rarely occurs；
unless the guest has allowed himself to become the inmate of a residence
or yacht。 Then he takes his chance with other members of the household；
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and if the host or hostess happens to have a bad temper as a set…off to their
good table； it is apt to fare ill with our friend。
So far； I have spoken of this class in the masculine； which is an error；
as the art is successfully practised by the weaker sex； with this shade of
difference。 As an unmarried woman is in less general demand； she is apt to
attach herself to one dear friend； always sure to be a lady in possession of
fine country and city houses and other appurtenances of wealth； often of
inferior social standing； so that there is give and take； the guest rendering
real service to an ambitious hostess。 The feminine aspirant need not be
handsome。 On the contrary； an agreeable plainness is much more
acceptable； serving as a foil。 But she must be excellent in all games； from
golf to piquet； and willing to play as often and as long as required。 She
must also cheerfully go in to dinner with the blue ribbon bore of the
evening； only asked on account of his pretty wife （by the bye； why is it
that Beauty is so often flanked by the Beast？）； and sit between him and the
〃second prize〃 bore。 These two worthies would have been the portion of
the hostess fifteen years ago； she would have considered it her duty to
absorb them and prevent her other guests suffering。 MAIS NOUS AVONS
CHANGE TOUT CELA。 The lady of the house now thinks first of
amusing herself； and arranges to sit between two favorites。
Society has become much simpler； and especially less expensive； for
unmarried men than it used to be。 Even if a hostess asks a favor in return
for weeks of hospitality； the sacrifice she requires of a man is rarely
greater than a cotillion with an unattractive debutante whom she is trying
to launch； or the sitting through a particularly dull opera in order to see her
to the carriage； her lord and master having slipped off early to his club and
a quiet game of pool。 Many people who read these lines are old enough to
remember that prehistoric period when unmarried girls went to the theatre
and parties； alone with the men they knew。 This custom still prevails in our
irrepressible West。 It was an arrangement by which all the expenses fell on
the man … theatre tickets； carriages if it rained； and often a bit of supper
after。 If a youth asked a girl to dance the cotillion； he was expected to send
a bouquet； sure to cost between twenty and twenty…five dollars。 What a
blessed change for the impecunious swell when all this went out of fashion！
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New York is his paradise now； in other parts of the world something is still
expected of him。 In France it takes the form of a handsome bag of bon…
bons on New Year's Day； if he has accepted hospitality during the past
year。 While here he need do absolutely nothing （unless he wishes to）； the
occasional leaving of a card having been suppressed of late by our
JEUNESSE DOREE； five minutes of their society in an opera box being
estimated （by them） as ample return for a dinner or a week in a country
house。
The truth of it is； there are so few men who 〃go out〃 （it being
practically impossible for any one working at a serious profession to sit up
night after night； even if he desired）； and at the same time so many women
insist on entertaining to amuse themselves or better their position； that the
men who go about get spoiled and almost come to consider the obligation
conferred； when they dine out。 There is no more amusing sight than poor
paterfamilias sitting in the club between six and seven P。M。 pretending to
read the evening paper； but really with his eve on the door； he has been
sent down by his wife to 〃get a man；〃 as she is one short for her dinner this
evening。 He must be one who will fit in well with the other guests； hence
papa's anxious look； and the reason the editorial gets so little of his
attention！ Watch him as young 〃professional〃 lounges in。 There is just his
man … if he only happens to be disengaged！ You will see 〃Pater〃 cross the
room and shake hands； then； after a few minutes' whispered conversation；
he will walk down to his coupe with such a relieved look on his face。
Young 〃professional；〃 who is in faultless evening dress； will ring for a
cocktail and take up the discarded evening paper to pass the time till eight
twenty…five。
Eight twenty…five； advisedly； for he will be the last to arrive； knowing；
clever dog； how much eCLAT it gives one to have a room full of people
asking each other； 〃Whom are we waiting for？〃 when the door opens； and
he is announced。 He will stay a moment after the other guests have gone
and receive the most cordial pressures of the hand from a grateful hostess
（if not spoken words of thanks） in return for eating an exquisitely cooked
dinner； seated between two agreeable women； drinking irreproachable
wine； smoking a cigar； and washing the whole down with a glass of 1830
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brandy； or some priceless historic madeira。
There is probably a moral to be extracted from all this。 But frankly my
ethics are so mixed that I fail to see where the blame lies； and which is the
less worthy individual； the ostentatious axe…grinding host or the interested
guest。 One thing； however； I see clearly； viz。； that life is very agreeable to
him who starts in with few prejudices； good manners； a large amount of
well…concealed 〃cheek〃 and the happy faculty of taking things as they
come。
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CHAPTER 36 … American Society
in Italy
THE phrase at the head of this chapter and other sentences