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Well; for my part; I would say no more。 But presently I would come
to know you had arrived at some fresh decision more fatally foolish
than ever。 〃Ah! my dear man;〃 I would say; 〃what madness next!〃 But he
would only look at me askance and say: 〃Just weave your web; please;
else your cheeks will smart for hours。 War is men's business!〃
MAGISTRATE
Bravo! well said indeed!
LYSISTRATA
How now; wretched man? not to let us contend against your
follies was bad enough! But presently we heard you asking out loud
in the open street: 〃Is there never a man left in Athens?〃 and; 〃No;
not one; not one;〃 you were assured in reply。 Then; then we made up
our minds without more delay to make common cause to save Greece。 Open
your ears to our wise counsels and hold your tongues; and we may yet
put things on a better footing。
MAGISTRATE
You put things indeed! Oh! this is too much! The insolence of
the creatures!
LYSISTRATA
Be still!
MAGISTRATE
May I die a thousand deaths ere I obey one who wears a veil!
LYSISTRATA
If that's all that troubles you; here; take my veil; wrap it round
your head; and hold your tongue。
CLEONICE
Then take this basket; put on a girdle; card wool; munch beans。
The war shall be women's business。
LEADER OF CHORUS OF WOMEN
Lay aside your water…pots; we will guard them; we will help our
friends and companions。
CHORUS OF WOMEN (singing)
For myself; I will never weary of the dance; my knees will never
grow stiff with fatigue。 I will brave everything with my dear
allies; on whom Nature has lavished virtue; grace; boldness;
cleverness; and whose wisely directed energy is going to save the
State。
LEADER OF CHORUS OF WOMEN
Oh! my good; gallant Lysistrata; and all my friends; be ever
like a bundle of nettles; never let your anger slacken; the winds of
fortune blow our way。
LYSISTRATA
May gentle Love and the sweet Cyprian Queen shower seductive
charms on our breasts and our thighs。 If only we may stir so amorous a
feeling among the men that they stand as firm as sticks; we shall
indeed deserve the name of peace…makers among the Greeks。
MAGISTRATE
How will that be; pray?
LYSISTRATA
To begin with; we shall not see you any more running like mad
fellows to the Market holding lance in fist。
CLEONICE
That will be something gained; anyway; by the Paphian goddess;
it will!
LYSISTRATA
Now we see them; mixed up with saucepans and kitchen stuff;
armed to the teeth; looking like wild Corybantes!
MAGISTRATE
Why; of course; that's what brave men should do。
LYSISTRATA
Oh! but what a funny sight; to behold a man wearing a
Gorgon's…bead buckler coming along to buy fish!
CLEONICE
The other day in the Market I saw a phylarch with flowing
ringlets; he was on horseback; and was pouring into his helmet the
broth he had just bought at an old dame's still。 There was a
Thracian warrior too; who was brandishing his lance like Tereus in the
play; he had scared a good woman selling figs into a perfect panic;
and was gobbling up all her ripest fruit…
MAGISTRATE
And how; pray; would you propose to restore peace and order in all
the countries of Greece?
LYSISTRATA
It's the easiest thing in the world!
MAGISTRATE
Come; tell us how; I am curious to know。
LYSISTRATA
When we are winding thread; and it is tangled; we pass the spool
across and through the skein; now this way; now that way; even so;
to finish of the war; we shall send embassies hither and thither and
everywhere; to disentangle matters。
MAGISTRATE
And is it with your yarn; and your skeins; and your spools; you
think to appease so many bitter enmities; you silly women?
LYSISTRATA
If only you had common sense; you would always do in politics
the same as we do with our yarn。
MAGISTRATE
Come; how is that; eh?
LYSISTRATA
First we wash the yarn to separate the grease and filth; do the
same with all bad citizens; sort them out and drive them forth with
rods…they're the refuse of the city。 Then for all such as come
crowding up in search of employments and offices; we must card them
thoroughly; then; to bring them all to the same standard; pitch them
pell…mell into the same basket; resident aliens or no; allies; debtors
to the State; all mixed up together。 Then as for our Colonies; you
must think of them as so many isolated hanks; find the ends of the
separate threads; draw them to a centre here; wind them into one; make
one great hank of the lot; out of which the public can weave itself
a good; stout tunic。
MAGISTRATE
Is it not a sin and a shame to see them carding and winding the
State; these women who have neither art nor part in the burdens of the
war?
LYSISTRATA
What! wretched man! why; it's a far heavier burden to us than to
you。 In the first place; we bear sons who go off to fight far away
from Athens。
MAGISTRATE
Enough said! do not recall sad and sorry memories!
LYSISTRATA
Then secondly; instead of enjoying the pleasures of love and
making the best of our youth and beauty; we are left to languish far
from our husbands; who are all with the army。 But say no more of
ourselves; what afflicts me is to see our girls growing old in
lonely grief。
MAGISTRATE
Don't the men grow old too?
LYSISTRATA
That is not the same thing。 When the soldier returns from the
wars; even though he has white hair; he very soon finds a young
wife。 But a woman has only one summer; if she does not make hay
while the sun shines; no one will afterwards have anything to say to
her; and she spends her days consulting oracles that never send her
a husband。
MAGISTRATE
But the old man who can still get an erection。。。
LYSISTRATA
But you; why don't you get done with it and die? You are rich;
go buy yourself a bier; and I will knead you a honey…cake for
Cerberus。 Here; take this garland。
(Drenching him with water。)
CLEONICE
And this one too。
(Drenching him with water。)
MYRRHINE
And these fillets。
(Drenching him with water。)
LYSISTRATA
What else do you need? Step aboard the boat; Charon is waiting for
you; you're keeping him from pushing off。
MAGISTRATE
To treat me so scurvily! What an insult! I will go show myself
to my fellow…magistrates just as I am。
LYSISTRATA
What! are you blaming us for not having exposed you according to
custom? Nay; console yourself; we will not fail to offer up the
third…day sacrifice for you; first thing in the morning。
(She goes into the Acropolis; with CLEONICE and MYRRHINE。)
LEADER OF CHORUS OF OLD MEN
Awake; friends of freedom; let us hold ourselves aye ready to act。
CHORUS OF OLD MEN (singing)
I suspect a mighty peril; I foresee another tyranny like Hippias'。
I am sore afraid the Laconians assembled here with Clisthenes have; by
a stratagem of war; stirred up these women; enemies of the gods; to
seize upon our treasury and the funds whereby I lived。
LEADER OF CHORUS OF OLD MEN
Is it not a sin and a shame for them to interfere in advising
the citizens; to prate of shields and lances; and to ally themselves
with Laconians; fellows I trust no more than I would so many
famished wolves? The whole thing; my friends; is nothing else but an
attempt to re…establish tyranny。 But I will never submit; I will be on
my guard for the future; I will always carry a blade hidden under
myrtle boughs; I will post myself in the public square under arms;
shoulder to shoulder with Aristogiton; and now; to make a start; I
must just break a few of that cursed old jade's teeth yonder。
LEADER OF CHORUS OF WOMEN
Nay; never play the brave man; else when you go back home; your
own mother won't know you。 But; dear friends and allies; first let
us lay our burdens down。
CHORUS OF WOMEN (singing)
Then; citizens all; hear what I have to say。 I have useful counsel
to give our city; which deserves it well at my hands for the brilliant
distinctions it has lavished on my girlhood。 At seven years of age;
I carried the sacred vessels; at ten; I pounded barley for the altar
of Athene; next; clad in a robe of yellow silk; I played the bear to
Artemis at the Brauronia; presently; when I was grown up; a tall;
handsome maiden; they put a necklace of dried figs about my neck;
and I was on