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You dear old woman； I would fain kiss you。
WOMAN
I will set you crying without onions。
OLD MAN
And give you a sound kicking。
WOMAN （pointing）
Ah； ha！ what a dense forest you have there！
OLD MAN
So was Myronides one of the bushiest of men of this side； his
backside was all black； and he terrified his enemies as much as
Phormio。
CHORUS OF WOMEN （singing）
I want to tell you a fable too； to match yours about Melanion。
Once there was a certain man called Timon； a tough customer； and a
whimsical； a true son of the Furies； with a face that seemed to
glare out of a thorn…bush。 He withdrew from the world because he
couldn't abide bad men； after vomiting a thousand curses at them。 He
had a holy horror of ill…conditioned fellows； but he was mighty tender
towards women。
WOMAN （beginning another duet）
Suppose I up and broke your jaw for you！
OLD MAN
I am not a bit afraid of you。
WOMAN
Suppose I let fly a good kick at you？
OLD MAN
I should see your thing then。
WOMAN
You would see that； for all my age； it is very well plucked。
LYSISTRATA （rushing out of the Acropolis）
Ho there！ come quick； come quick！
ONE OF THE WOMEN
What is it？ Why these cries？
LYSISTRATA
A man！ a man！ I see him approaching all afire with the flames of
love。 Oh！ divine Queen of Cyprus； Paphos and Cythera； I pray you still
be propitious to our enterprise。
WOMAN
Where is he； this unknown foe？
LYSISTRATA
Over there…beside the Temple of Demeter。
WOMAN
Yes； indeed； I see him； but who is he？
LYSISTRATA
Look； look！ do any of you recognize him？
MYRRHINE （joyfully）
I do； I do！ it's my husband Cinesias。
LYSISTRATA
To work then！ Be it your task to inflame and torture and torment
him。 Seductions； caresses； provocations； refusals； try every means！
Grant every favour；…always excepting what is forbidden by our oath
on the wine…bowl。
MYRRHINE
Have no fear； I'll do it。
LYSISTRATA
Well； I shall stay here to help you cajole the man and set his
passions aflame。 The rest of you withdraw。
（CINESIAS enters； in obvious and extreme sexual excitement。 A
slave follows him carrying an infant。）
CINESIAS
Alas！ alas！ how I am tortured by spasm and rigid convulsion！ Oh！ I
am racked on the wheel！
LYSISTRATA
Who is this that dares to pass our lines？
CINESIAS
It is I。
LYSISTRATA
What； a man？
CINESIAS
Very much so！
LYSISTRATA
Get out。
CINESIAS
But who are you that thus repulses me？
LYSISTRATA
The sentinel of the day。
CINESIAS
For the gods' sake； call Myrrhine。
LYSISTRATA
Call Myrrhine； you say？ And who are you？
CINESIAS
I am her husband； Cinesias； son of Paeon。
LYSISTRATA
Ah！ good day； my dear friend。 Your name is not unknown amongst us。
Your wife has it forever on her lips； and she never touches an egg
or an apple without saying： 〃This is for Cinesias。〃
CINESIAS
Really and truly？
LYSISTRATA
Yes； indeed； by Aphrodite！ And if we fall to talking of men； quick
your wife declares： 〃Oh！ all the rest； they're good for nothing
compared with Cinesias。〃
CINESIAS
Oh！ please； please go and call her to me！
LYSISTRATA
And what will you give me for my trouble？
CINESIAS
Anything I've got； if you like。 （Pointing to the evidence of
his condition） I will give you what I have here！
LYSISTRATA
Well； well； I will tell her to come。
（She enters the Acropolis。）
CINESIAS
Quick； oh！ be quick！ Life has no more charms for me since she left
my house。 I am sad； sad； when I go indoors； it all seems so empty；
my victuals have lost their savour。 And all because of this erection
that I can't get rid of！
MYRRHINE （to LYSISTRATA； over her shoulder）
I love him； oh！ I love him； but he won't let himself be loved。 No！
I shall not come。
CINESIAS
Myrrhine； my little darling Myrrhine； what are you saying？ Come
down to me quick。
MYRRHINE
No indeed； not I。
CINESIAS
I call you； Myrrhine； Myrrhine； won't you please come？
MYRRHINE
Why should you call me？ You do not want me。
CINESIAS
Not want you！ Why； here I stand； stiff with desire！
oMYRRHINE
Good…bye。
（She turns； as if to go。）
CINESIAS
Oh！ Myrrhine； Myrrhine； in our child's name； hear me； at any
rate hear the child！ Little lad； call your mother。
CHILD
Mamma； mamma； mamma！
CINESIAS
There； listen！ Don't you pity the poor child？ It's six days now
you've never washed and never fed the child。
MYRRHINE
Poor darling； your father takes mighty little care of you！
CINESIAS
Come down； dearest； come down for the child's sake。
MYRRHINE
Ah！ what a thing it is to be a mother！ Well； well； we must come
down； I suppose。
CINESIAS （as MYRRHINE approaches）
Why； how much younger and prettier she looks！ And how she looks at
me so lovingly！ Her cruelty and scorn only redouble my passion。
MYRRHINE （ignoring him； to the child）
You are as sweet as your father is provoking！ Let me kiss you；
my treasure； mother's darling！
CINESIAS
Ah！ what a bad thing it is to let yourself be led away by other
women！ Why give me such pain and suffering； and yourself into the
bargain？
MYRRHINE （as he is about to embrace her）
Hands off； sir！
CINESIAS
Everything is going to rack and ruin in the house。
MYRRHINE
I don't care。
CINESIAS
But your web that's all being pecked to pieces by the cocks and
hens； don't you care for that？
MYRRHINE
Precious little。
CINESIAS
And Aphrodite； whose mysteries you have not celebrated for so
long？ Oh！ won't you please come back home？
MYRRHINE
No； least； not till a sound treaty puts an end to the war。
CINESIAS
Well； if you wish it so much； why； we'll make it； your treaty。
MYRRHINE
Well and good！ When that's done； I will come home。 Till then； I am
bound by an oath。
CINESIAS
At any rate； lie with me for a little while。
MYRRHINE
No； no； no！ （she hesitates） but just the same I can't say I
don't love you。
CINESIAS
You love me？ Then why refuse to lie with me； my little girl； my
sweet Myrrhine？
MYRRHINE （pretending to be shocked）
You must be joking！ What； before the child！
CINESIAS （to the slave）
Manes； carry the lad home。 There； you see； the child is gone；
there's nothing to hinder us； won't you lie down now？
MYRRHINE
But； miserable man； where； where？
CINESIAS
In the cave of Pan； nothing could be better。
MYRRHINE
But how shall I purify myself before going back into the citadel？
CINESIAS
Nothing easier！ you can wash at the Clepsydra。
MYRRHINE
But my oath？ Do you want me to perjure myself？
CINESIAS
I'll take all responsibility； don't worry。
MYRRHINE
Well； I'll be off； then； and find a bed for us。
CINESIAS
There's no point in that； surely we can lie on the ground。
MYRRHINE
No； no！ even though you are bad； I don't like your lying on the
bare earth。
（She goes back into the Acropolis。）
CINESIAS （enraptured）
Ah！ how the dear girl loves me！
MYRRHINE （coming back with a cot）
Come； get to bed quick； I am going to undress。 But； oh dear； we
must get a mattress。
CINESIAS
A mattress？ Oh！ no； never mind about that！
MYRRHINE
No； by Artemis！ lie on the bare sacking？ never！ That would be
squalid。
CINESIAS
Kiss me！
MYRRHINE
Wait a minute！
（She leaves him again。）
CINESIAS
Good god； hurry up
MYRRHINE （coming back with a mattress）
Here is a mattress。 Lie down； I am just going to undress。 But
you've got no pillow。
CINESIAS
I don't want one either！
MYRRHINE
But I do。
（She leaves him again。）
CINESIAS
Oh god； oh god； she treats my tool just like Heracles！
MYRRHINE （coming back with a pillow）
There； lift your head； dear！ （Wondering what else to tantalize
him with； to herself） Is that all； I wonder？
CINESIAS （misunderstanding）