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bed。
As soon as the shutters were opened Mme。 Herrnet asked：
〃How is George？〃
〃Oh； not at all well to…day； madame。〃
She did not rise until noon； when she ate two eggs with a cup of tea； as
if she herself had been ill； and then she went out to a druggist's to
inquire about prophylactic measures against the contagion of small…pox。
She did not come home until dinner time； laden with medicine bottles； and
shut herself up at once in her room； where she saturated herself with
disinfectants。
The priest was waiting for her in the dining…room。 As soon as she saw
him she exclaimed in a voice full of emotion：
〃Well？〃
〃No improvement。 The doctor is very anxious：〃
She began to cry and could eat nothing； she was so worried。
The next day； as soon as it was light； she sent to inquire for her son；
but there was no improvement and she spent the whole day in her room；
where little braziers were giving out pungent odors。 Her maid said also
that you could hear her sighing all the evening。
She spent a whole week in this manner； only going out for an hour or two
during the afternoon to breathe the air。
She now sent to make inquiries every hour； and would sob when the reports
were unfavorable。
On the morning of the eleventh day the priest； having been announced；
entered her room； his face grave and pale； and said； without taking the
chair she offered him：
〃Madame； your son is very ill and wishes to see you。〃
She fell on her knees； exclaiming：
〃Oh； my God！ Oh； my God！ I would never dare！ My God！ My God！ Help
me！〃
The priest continued：
〃The doctor holds out little hope； madame； and George is expecting you！〃
And he left the room。
Two hours later as the young lad； feeling himself dying； again asked for
his mother； the abbe went to her again and found her still on her knees；
still weeping and repeating：
〃I will not 。 。 。 。 I will not。 。 。 。 I am too much afraid 。 。
。 。 I will not。 。 。 。〃
He tried to persuade her； to strengthen her； to lead her。 He only
succeeded in bringing on an attack of 〃nerves〃 that lasted some time and
caused her to shriek。
The doctor when he came in the evening was told of this cowardice and
declared that he would bring her in himself； of her own volition； or by
force。 But after trying all manner of argument and just as he seized her
round the waist to carry her into her son's room； she caught hold of the
door and clung to it so firmly that they could not drag her away。 Then
when they let go of her she fell at the feet of the doctor； begging his
forgiveness and acknowledging that she was a wretched creature。 And then
she exclaimed： 〃Oh； he is not going to die； tell me that he is not going
to die； I beg of you； tell him that I love him； that I worship him。 。 。〃
The young lad was dying。 Feeling that he had only a few moments more to
live； he entreated that his mother be persuaded to come and bid him a
last farewell。 With that sort of presentiment that the dying sometimes
have； he had understood； had guessed all； and he said： 〃If she is afraid
to come into the room； beg her just to come on the balcony as far as my
window so that I may see her； at least； so that I may take a farewell
look at her； as I cannot kiss her。〃
The doctor and the abbe； once more； went together to this woman and
assured her： 〃You will run no risk； for there will be a pane of glass
between you and him。〃
She consented； covered up her head； and took with her a bottle of
smelling salts。 She took three steps on the balcony； then； all at once；
hiding her face in her hands； she moaned： 〃No 。 。 。 no 。 。 。 I
would never dare to look at him 。 。 。 never。 。 。 。 I am too much
ashamed 。 。 。 too much afraid 。 。 。 。 No 。 。 。 I cannot。〃
They endeavored to drag her along； but she held on with both hands to the
railings and uttered such plaints that the passers…by in the street
raised their heads。 And the dying boy waited； his eyes turned towards
that window； waited to die until he could see for the last time the
sweet； beloved face； the worshiped face of his mother。
He waited long； and night came on。 Then he turned over with his face to
the wall and was silent。
When day broke he was dead。 The day following she was crazy。
THE MAGIC COUCH
The Seine flowed past my house； without a ripple on its surface； and
gleaming in the bright morning sunlight。 It was a beautiful； broad；
indolent silver stream； with crimson lights here and there； and on the
opposite side of the river were rows of tall trees that covered all the
bank with an immense wall of verdure。
The sensation of life which is renewed each day； of fresh； happy； loving
life trembled in the leaves； palpitated in the air； was mirrored in the
water。
The postman had just brought my papers； which were handed to me； and I
walked slowly to the river bank in order to read them。
In the first paper I opened I noticed this headline； 〃Statistics of
Suicides；〃 and I read that more than 8；500 persons had killed themselves
in that year。
In a moment I seemed to see them！ I saw this voluntary and hideous
massacre of the despairing who were weary of life。 I saw men bleeding；
their jaws fractured； their skulls cloven； their breasts pierced by a
bullet； slowly dying； alone in a little room in a hotel； giving no
thought to their wound； but thinking only of their misfortunes。
I saw others seated before a tumbler in which some matches were soaking；
or before a little bottle with a red label。
They would look at it fixedly without moving； then they would drink and
await the result； then a spasm would convulse their cheeks and draw their
lips together； their eyes would grow wild with terror； for they did not
know that the end would be preceded by so much suffering。
They rose to their feet； paused； fell over and with their hands pressed
to their stomachs they felt their internal organs on fire； their entrails
devoured by the fiery liquid； before their minds began to grow dim。
I saw others hanging from a nail in the wall； from the fastening of the
window； from a hook in the ceiling； from a beam in the garret； from a
branch of a tree amid the evening rain。 And I surmised all that had
happened before they hung there motionless； their tongues hanging out of
their mouths。 I imagined the anguish of their heart； their final
hesitation； their attempts to fasten the rope； to determine that it was
secure； then to pass the noose round their neck and to let themselves
fall。
I saw others lying on wretched beds； mothers with their little children；
old men dying of hunger； young girls dying for love； all rigid；
suffocated； asphyxiated； while in the center of the room the brasier
still gave forth the fumes of charcoal。
And I saw others walking at night along the deserted bridges。 These were
the most sinister。 The water flowed under the arches with a low sound。
They did not see it 。 。 。 they guessed at it from its cool breath！
They longed for it and they feared it。 They dared not do it！ And yet；
they must。 A distant clock sounded the hour and； suddenly； in the vast
silence of the night； there was heard the splash of a body falling into
the river； a scream or two； the sound of hands beating the water； and all
was still。 Sometimes； even； there was only the sound of the falling body
when they had tied their arms down or fastened a stone to their feet。
Oh； the poor things； the poor things； the poor things； how I felt their
anguish； how I died in their death！ I went through all their
wretchedness； I endured in one hour all their tortures。 I knew all the
sorrows that had led them to this； for I know the deceitful infamy of
life； and no one has felt it more than I have。
How I understood them； these who weak； harassed by misfortune； having
lost those they loved； awakened from the dream of a tardy compensation；
from the illusion of another existence where God will finally be just；
after having been ferocious； and their minds disabused of the mirages of
happiness； have given up the fight and desire to put an end to this
ceaseless tragedy； or this shameful comedy。
Suicide！ Why； it is the strength of those whose strength is exhausted；
the hope of those who no longer believe； the sublime courage of the
conquered！ Yes； there is at least one door to this life we can always
open and pass through to the other side。 Nature had an impulse of pity；
she did not shut us up in prison。 Mercy for the despairing！
As for those who are simply disillusioned； let them march ahead with free
soul and quiet heart。 They have nothing to fear since they may take
their leave； for behind them there is always this door that the gods of
our illusions cannot even lock。
I thought of this crowd of suicides： more than eight thousand five
hundred in one year。 And it seemed to me that they had combined to send
to the world a prayer； to utter a cry of appeal； to demand something that
should come into effect later when we understood things better。 It
seemed to me that all these victims； their throats cut； poisoned； hung；
asphyxiated； or drowned； all came together； a frightful horde； like
citizens to the polls； to