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utterly seriously； a little later still； lovingly； gratefully；
devotedly； finally： fiercely； rabidly； uncompromisingly。 After
that I was welded to my faith； I was theoretically ready to die
for it； and I looked down with compassion not unmixed with scorn
upon everybody else's faith that didn't tally with mine。 That
faith； imposed upon me by self…interest in that ancient day；
remains my faith today； and in it I find comfort； solace； peace；
and never…failing joy。 You see how curiously theological it is。
The 〃rice Christian〃 of the Orient goes through the very same
steps； when he is after rice and the missionary is after HIM； he
goes for rice； and remains to worship。
Ealer did a lot of our 〃reasoning〃not to say substantially
all of it。 The slaves of his cult have a passion for calling it
by that large name。 We others do not call our inductions and
deductions and reductions by any name at all。 They show for
themselves what they are； and we can with tranquil confidence
leave the world to ennoble them with a title of its own choosing。
Now and then when Ealer had to stop to cough； I pulled my
induction…talents together and hove the controversial lead
myself： always getting eight feet； eight and a half； often nine；
sometimes even quarter…less…twainas _I_ believed； but always
〃no bottom；〃 as HE said。
I got the best of him only once。 I prepared myself。 I
wrote out a passage from Shakespeareit may have been the very
one I quoted awhile ago； I don't rememberand riddled it with
his wild steamboatful interlardings。 When an unrisky opportunity
offered； one lovely summer day； when we had sounded and buoyed a
tangled patch of crossings known as Hell's Half Acre； and were
aboard again and he had sneaked the PENNSYLVANIA triumphantly
through it without once scraping sand； and the A。 T。 LACEY had
followed in our wake and got stuck； and he was feeling good； I
showed it to him。 It amused him。 I asked him to fire it off
READ it； read it； I diplomatically added； as only HE could read
dramatic poetry。 The compliment touched him where he lived。 He
did read it； read it with surpassing fire and spirit； read it as
it will never be read again； for HE know how to put the right
music into those thunderous interlardings and make them seem a
part of the text； make them sound as if they were bursting from
Shakespeare's own soul； each one of them a golden inspiration and
not to be left out without damage to the massed and magnificent
whole。
I waited a week； to let the incident fade； waited longer；
waited until he brought up for reasonings and vituperation my pet
position； my pet argument； the one which I was fondest of； the
one which I prized far above all others in my ammunition…wagon
to wit； that Shakespeare couldn't have written Shakespeare's
words； for the reason that the man who wrote them was limitlessly
familiar with the laws； and the law…courts； and law…proceedings；
and lawyer…talk； and lawyer…waysand if Shakespeare was
possessed of the infinitely divided star…dust that constituted
this vast wealth； HOW did he get it； and WHERE and WHEN？
〃From books。〃
From books！ That was always the idea。 I answered as my
readings of the champions of my side of the great controversy had
taught me to answer： that a man can't handle glibly and easily
and comfortably and successfully the argot of a trade at which he
has not personally served。 He will make mistakes； he will not；
and cannot； get the trade…phrasings precisely and exactly right；
and the moment he departs； by even a shade； from a common trade…
form； the reader who has served that trade will know the writer
HASN'T。 Ealer would not be convinced； he said a man could learn
how to correctly handle the subtleties and mysteries and free…
masonries of ANY trade by careful reading and studying。 But when
I got him to read again the passage from Shakespeare with the
interlardings； he perceived； himself； that books couldn't teach a
student a bewildering multitude of pilot…phrases so thoroughly
and perfectly that he could talk them off in book and play or
conversation and make no mistake that a pilot would not
immediately discover。 It was a triumph for me。 He was silent
awhile； and I knew what was happeninghe was losing his temper。
And I knew he would presently close the session with the same old
argument that was always his stay and his support in time of
need； the same old argument； the one I couldn't answer； because I
dasn'tthe argument that I was an ass； and better shut up。 He
delivered it； and I obeyed。
O dear； how long ago it washow pathetically long ago！ And
here am I； old； forsaken； forlorn； and alone； arranging to get
that argument out of somebody again。
When a man has a passion for Shakespeare； it goes without
saying that he keeps company with other standard authors。 Ealer
always had several high…class books in the pilot…house； and he
read the same ones over and over again； and did not care to
change to newer and fresher ones。 He played well on the flute；
and greatly enjoyed hearing himself play。 So did I。 He had a
notion that a flute would keep its health better if you took it
apart when it was not standing a watch； and so； when it was not
on duty it took its rest； disjointed； on the compass…shelf under
the breastboard。 When the PENNSYLVANIA blew up and became a
drifting rack…heap freighted with wounded and dying poor souls
（my young brother Henry among them）； pilot Brown had the watch
below； and was probably asleep and never knew what killed him；
but Ealer escaped unhurt。 He and his pilot…house were shot up
into the air； then they fell； and Ealer sank through the ragged
cavern where the hurricane…deck and the boiler…deck had been； and
landed in a nest of ruins on the main deck； on top of one of the
unexploded boilers； where he lay prone in a fog of scald and
deadly steam。 But not for long。 He did not lose his headlong
familiarity with danger had taught him to keep it； in any and all
emergencies。 He held his coat…lapels to his nose with one hand；
to keep out the steam； and scrabbled around with the other till
he found the joints of his flute； then he took measures to save
himself alive； and was successful。 I was not on board。 I had
been put ashore in New Orleans by Captain Klinenfelter。 The
reasonhowever； I have told all about it in the book called OLD
TIMES ON THE MISSISSIPPI； and it isn't important； anyway； it is
so long ago。
II
When I was a Sunday…school scholar； something more than
sixty years ago； I became interested in Satan； and wanted to find
out all I could about him。 I began to ask questions； but my
class…teacher； Mr。 Barclay； the stone…mason； was reluctant about
answering them； it seemed to me。 I was anxious to be praised for
turning my thoughts to serious subjects when there wasn't another
boy in the village who could be hired to do such a thing。 I was
greatly interested in the incident of Eve and the serpent； and
thought Eve's calmness was perfectly noble。 I asked Mr。 Barclay
if he had ever heard of another woman who； being approached by a
serpeant； would not excuse herself and break for the nearest
timber。 He did not answer my question； but rebuked me for
inquiring into matters above my age and comprehension。 I will
say for Mr。 Barclay that he was willing to tell me the facts of
Satan's history； but he stopped there： he wouldn't allow any
discussion of them。
In the course of time we exhausted the facts。 There were
only five or six of them； you could set them all down on a
visiting…card。 I was disappointed。 I had been meditating a
biography； and was grieved to find that there were no materials。
I said as much； with the tears running down。 Mr。 Barclay's
sympathy and compassion were aroused； for he was a most kind and
gentle…spirited man； and he patted me on the head and cheered me
up by saying there was a whole vast ocean of materials！ I can
still feel the happy thrill which these blessed words shot
through me。
Then he began to bail out that ocean's riches for my
encouragement and joy。 Like this： it was 〃conjectured〃though
not establishedthat Satan was originally an angel in Heaven；
that he fell； that he rebelled； and brought on a war； that he was
defeated； and banished to perdition。 Also； 〃we have reason to
believe〃 that later he did so and so； that 〃we are warranted in
supposing〃 that at a subsequent time he traveled extensively；
seeking whom he might devour； that a couple of centuries
afterward； 〃as tradition instructs us；〃 he took up the cruel
trade of tempting people to their ruin； with vast and fearful
results； that by and by； 〃as the probabilities seem to indicate；〃
he may have done certain things； he might have done certain other
things； he must have done still other things。
And so on and so on。 We set down the five known facts by
themselves on a piece of paper； a